sqbr: me cosplaying the bearded dwarf cheery longbottom, titled Expressing my femininity with an axe (femininity)
Sunday, July 24th, 2016 07:37 pm
What options do you want to see in games which allow the player to customise their character's gender and appearance? What existing games have impressed you?

Read more... )
sqbr: me cosplaying the bearded dwarf cheery longbottom, titled Expressing my femininity with an axe (femininity)
Saturday, June 4th, 2016 11:55 am
So I spent the last however many years building up resources and social environments etc so I no longer felt so confused and alone about being a biromantic grey asexual woman. And now feel like I have to start all over again with being genderfluid :( I'm at the point where I don't so much have questions as like....a blank of ignorance I need to sketch out before I even know what the questions are.
What I'm not looking for )
So does anyone have any recs? Books, websites, blogs, anything. Formal or informal, even fiction if it's got something useful to say (though not just "any good book with some mention of non binary genders"). They don't have to be entirely focussed on non binary people as long as they are genuinely inclusive. I guess what I'd like, to the extent it exists, is an equivalent to the breadth of feminist spaces, but either focussed on or equally inclusive of non binary people.

What I have so far:
Notes from a Wiscon panel on The Pitfalls of Haphazard Gender Inclusion with links to panelists' blogs
Notes from a "Beyond the Binary" panel which includes a bunch of links and the blog it's on.
A post with questions about how non binary and trans people fit into feminism and the "lifeoutsidethebinary" blog it's on.
Chaos Life is a comic created by an agender person which I generally like.

These are definitely something to start with (my browser is a wall of tabs right now :)), but recs would still be super useful.

(Also I need to make a new gender icon this one doesn't quite feel right any more!)
sqbr: (up and down)
Thursday, May 5th, 2016 05:36 pm
So, a question that's come up in a game I'm working on, and is likely to come up again in future: how do you combine allowing the player character (PC) of a dating sim having a spectrum of gender identities available with having love interests who aren't all bi/pan?
Read more... )
sqbr: "Creative genius" with an arrow pointing to a sketch of me (genius!)
Wednesday, March 9th, 2016 11:50 am
I don't know if any of you guys can help with this, but if nothing else writing it all out will help me get it straight in my head.

So! I like to put wheelchair users in my games, because nobody else is going to. I feel reasonably confident writing/drawing people in my position: in a powerchair due to relatively recently acquired fatigue. Thanks to online research I also feel moderately confident with the Default Wheelchair User Character: a young, otherwise healthy paraplegic or amputee in a manual chair. The protagonist of SOON is this kind of character.

But I'm having trouble researching wheelchair using characters of other sorts, especially older people.
Read more... )
sqbr: Darkwing Duck in red (dw!)
Tuesday, December 30th, 2014 10:17 am
Recently it's felt like I've totally lost the ability to express disagreement with people I like without utterly ruining that relationship. Part of that is to do with various things going on with my personal life/brain chemistry but I'm wondering how much of it is that a lot of these conversations have moved to tumblr.

Like...in my experience the best arguments happen when you can be open and understanding and try and see the other person's pov, engage with what they're actually saying instead of what you THINK they're saying, and not get all defensive and antagonistic.

But I'm too wordy for asks or replies (and those often get replied to publically anyway) and when I post a reblog I feel very aware that I am engaging not just with that person but with everyone who reads me, everyone following the post, and all of their followers (if they reblog my reply). And that awareness makes it SUPER HARD to be all the things I said in the paragraph above. Even if I trust that person to engage with me in an open and productive way, I don't trust all those other people, and so I put my guard up.

Does anyone else have this problem? And if so how do you deal with it?

Emailing them privately is an option when I have their email address, but it makes everything seem SUPER SERIOUS which puts me off. There's also writing out my argument in a text editor and dividing it up into as many asks as neccesary, I again feel weird about it but maybe it's a better approach. I like that reblogs can feel more like a casual discussion instead of a super serious "taking aside to express private disagreement" but it so easily goes from casual discussion to huge visible argument it seems not to be worth the risk for fraught topics.

"Don't argue with people on tumblr" is not a helpful aproach for me, I have recently tried arguing less but there are some opinions I find too upsetting to let slide and in my experience these unspoken arguments have a tendency to bubble up and explode if you ignore them. "Don't follow people with opinions you want to argue with" would mean cutting out a lot of people I mostly really like. And an echo chamber of people who all entirely agree with me is not entirely appealing. I really like being able to have productive discussions with people with different povs, and I know I used to be better at it.

Thinking about, I have taken the "just don't argue with people and unfollow anyone who makes that unbearable" approach to twitter, because expressing myself in 140 characters is just impossible. But I follow a very different group of people there, and barely post at all.

EDIT: Some interesting responses on tumblr...which of course I can't easily link to because tumblr but at worst you'll have to scroll down a little through that tag.

(going to post this on tumblr too, god help me, but point out that this post exists as a space for conversation for those who prefer it)
sqbr: (up and down)
Saturday, December 27th, 2014 07:56 am
My battery has started running out AGAIN only a few months after getting it replaced last time. Anyone else had this problem? Is it plausibly just the price I pay for living on top of a really big hill? And if you live in Perth, where do you get yours replaced? I've been using Scooters Australia, which costs about $600 ie RATHER MORE than I'd like to be spending every few months /o\

Have been recharging whenever I'm not using it, trying not to let it run down too low when I'm out, and trying to keep the wheels inflated though we did forget about that for a while. And it's still run out faster than it did before I started doing any of those things.
sqbr: (up and down)
Thursday, January 17th, 2013 11:11 am
I keep seeing discussions about this on tumblr, and have a Theory about how it relates to age. Apologies to people over 55, I realise you are not a monolith :)

Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: Just the Poll Creator, participants: 48

How embarrassed would you say you are about the person you were at 14?

Very
5 (10.4%)

a little
12 (25.0%)

not at all
30 (62.5%)

I am 13 or under!
0 (0.0%)

other
1 (2.1%)

If you are fairly embarrassed, how old are you?

14
0 (0.0%)

15-19
2 (22.2%)

20-24
1 (11.1%)

25-29
2 (22.2%)

30-34
2 (22.2%)

35-39
1 (11.1%)

40-44
1 (11.1%)

45-49
0 (0.0%)

50-54
0 (0.0%)

55+
0 (0.0%)

If you are NOT particularly embarassed, how old are you?

14
0 (0.0%)

15-19
1 (2.4%)

20-24
5 (12.2%)

25-29
7 (17.1%)

30-34
8 (19.5%)

35-39
7 (17.1%)

40-44
5 (12.2%)

45-49
2 (4.9%)

50-54
2 (4.9%)

55+
4 (9.8%)

Tags:
sqbr: (up and down)
Friday, January 4th, 2013 07:49 pm
I would post this to [personal profile] alias_sqbr, but this is the paid account.

Imagine yourself pondering playing a free steampunk vampire f/f dating sim/visual novel. Which title sounds more appealing?

Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 28


Which title is more alluring?

View Answers

Copper Rose
15 (53.6%)

Copper Roses
13 (46.4%)

Other (explain in comments)
0 (0.0%)



In other news my visual novel project is coming along pretty well :) I keep being paranoid that we've wandered into unfortunate implications with various plot points despite all of us trying very hard not to, I will definitely be asking if any of you guys want to be in on the alpha once we get to that stage.
sqbr: me cosplaying the bearded dwarf cheery longbottom, titled Expressing my femininity with an axe (femininity)
Monday, December 31st, 2012 08:07 pm
This question is on behalf of my husband Cam aka [twitter.com profile] distantcam, since I thought you guys might be able to help.

The software engineering community has recently had a bunch of nasty sexism imbroglios with the same old "get harassed/belittled for being a woman, complain about harassment, get harassed/belittled for complaining" cycle seen in the geek community, atheism community etc.
See for example Stupid Question 107: Shhh… Harassment. Not a problem?.

There's currently a bunch of software engineers making noises about working together to fight against the entrenched sexism. Cam is very much on board with this, but thinks they should try and learn from other communities' experiences rather than reinventing the wheel. Also, engineers respond better to new ideas when you have links or other references to point them towards. I poked through my links but they're all focused on stuff like sexual harassment at cons rather than, say, women being ignored in professional settings.

My main advice for him as a male ally (based on my experiences as a white antiracist) is to try REALLY HARD to find female voices on the subject, and then use the microphone of male privilege to encourage all the other men to listen to those women.

So, what we're looking for:

  • Female Software engineers, or other women in male dominated professional fields, talking about their experiences and offering advice on fighting sexism
  • Explanations of why it's important to be actively inclusive not just "not really sexist"
  • Explanations of why it's important to center the discussion around women and women's voices
  • Ways for men to help in situations without being "white knights" or otherwise overbearing.
  • Anything else relevant and useful


Cam is going to subscribe to the comments, but will probably not reply to many since he is not as chatty as me :)
sqbr: "Creative genius" with an arrow pointing to a sketch of me (genius!)
Thursday, July 12th, 2012 08:25 pm
So, over on my art blog I've started a meme to draw 30 Monster Girls.

Both to keep it interesting and for Great Justice I like the idea of moving beyond the fairly narrow box of typical depictions of "monster girls" (or female monsters, which aren't quite the same but are close enough for my purposes) you usually see eg as on fuckyeahmonstergirls. Thinking about what that box really is has been instructive, and I'd love to get some suggestions for things you guys would like to see (can't guarantee I'll draw them, but more inspiration is always good!)
Read more... )
EDIT: Managed seven! I plan to do more later. Anyway, some things from the comments and elsewhere:
Femaleness is personified by cuteness as well as sexiness.
The definition of monster and the way it's used really does tie into disability a lot.
Markers of biological femaleness for monsters and non-humans can differ dramatically from ours (a mane-less lion for example)
the seam of skin and scales is a trans woman talking about "a feminism of the monstrous".
sqbr: pretty purple pi (Default)
Friday, February 24th, 2012 03:19 pm
Can someone give me a link to a post about why "derp" is abelist? There's a discussion on my twitter list, and there's no way I can summarise it in 140 characters.

(nb I am also pretty sleepy, so don't feel up to explaining it here either. If you're interested, I'm sure someone else will post a link eventually)
sqbr: Hannelore: Worry hat! Bravery plus 10, charisma plus 5 (worry hat)
Saturday, September 3rd, 2011 07:50 pm
So! I just made this anxiety related icon, and would like a similarly cheerful icon about being touch averse (and specifically, not liking hugs)

Thinking about it, while I had a number of sympathetic anxious characters to choose from I can't think of any positive portrayals of people being being touch averse in a good natured "this is just how I am" way, it's all grumpy messed up people like Fenris. Can anyone else think of any examples? Closest I can think of is Rogue, who is polite about telling people not to touch her or they'll die, but I'd rather someone less wracked with angst.
sqbr: me cosplaying the bearded dwarf cheery longbottom, titled Expressing my femininity with an axe (femininity)
Sunday, January 30th, 2011 08:06 am
While drafting a (still unfinished) reply to Real Sex 101 I googled vaginismus to make sure I had the spelling and definition right and discovered that the Wikipedia page assumes anyone with a vagina is a woman. Below is a draft corrected version but I've never edited Wikipedia before and HATE proofreading so am a bit hesitant to post it. I haven't done any major edits beyond ungendering the language, what do people think? It's pretty clunky in places, though not all of that is my fault :)
Read more... )
sqbr: Asterix-like magnifying glass over Perth, Western Australia (australia 2)
Sunday, July 25th, 2010 02:24 pm
I've been pondering how to do polls about various things in a way which minimises people feeling excluded or otherwise misrepresented. And I think the easiest way to test those ideas out is make polls and see what people don't like about them!

First off, nationality. As was pointed out to me the last time I tried doing a poll on this topic, just because I've lived in the same country my whole life and fit comfortably into it's majority culture doesn't mean other people's identities are so simple. It struck me that asking where people are currently located is a much less ambiguous question though of course you have to be careful not to then make the jump from "geographic location" to "national identity" in the analysis etc (especially since people might be on a three day business trip or something :)).

So! Please do this poll and then tell me anything about it that bugs you.
Where are you?? )
Tags:
sqbr: Darkwing Duck in red (dw!)
Sunday, July 11th, 2010 03:30 pm
I'm going to mess about with my access filters a bit, is there an easy way to see all my locked posts at once? I'm SURE I remember one but I can't find it.

Also: am going to be messing about with my access filters a bit :)
Tags:
sqbr: She's getting existential again. It's ok I have a super soaker. (existentialism)
Friday, July 9th, 2010 12:21 pm
EDIT: I have realised that this post, while it may have some merit, is mostly wrongheaded. I'm going to edit it to try and knock it into some sort of sense but keep in mind it used to be different. (Yes this erases my mistake, but it also means it's readable as a coherent argument)

I'm taking a break from responding to comments or editing the post etc while I think about the points people are making but I am increasingly uncomfortable with what I was saying. Ack.

Proof I shouldn't post when I have a cold )
sqbr: She's getting existential again. It's ok I have a super soaker. (existentialism)
Thursday, July 1st, 2010 01:15 pm
The problem:

I make fanworks (fic, art, and comics) which (since they're about people) touch on issues like race, class, gender, sexuality, disability etc. There is always the danger with these works that I've inadvertently made something Very Hurtful that I won't notice until someone points it out to me. If I just chuck stuff online based on my own judgement it could do a whole lot of harm before someone points out the Fail, and then I have to figure out how to fix it. (If your response to this is that I shouldn't worry about it, this post is not aimed at you but, for example, Racefail: same shit, different day is. I do not feel like arguing with you)

One common solution offered for this problem is being beta-ed, but this doesn't work for me. (Research and mindfulness etc do a most of the time, and thus I do them, but they're not entirely reliable by themselves)
Possible solutions )
sqbr: She's getting existential again. It's ok I have a super soaker. (existentialism)
Tuesday, June 22nd, 2010 07:09 am
I'm not entirely comfortable telling LGBTQIA people what "queer" means but I'm pretty sure the definition of "queer" at canonqueer is too narrow.

Anyway, they look like they would benefit from a wider range of opinions regardless (and could be an interesting comm!).
sqbr: And yet all I can think is, this will make for a great Dreamwidth entry... (dw)
Sunday, February 14th, 2010 07:25 pm
So LJ has finally crossed the line for me by not only having pop up ads which infect people's computers with a virus but infecting one of my friends in particular.

I have thus decided I will at some point swap over to cross-posting the stuff that currently goes in [livejournal.com profile] alias_sqbr from [personal profile] alias_sqbr (yes, keeping lj comments enabled).

But before I can do that I need to know: is there any easy to switch between two dreamwidth accounts? Preferably one that works in Safari.

*Tests out the crossposting footnote thing, which I only just figured out*
Tags:
sqbr: Darkwing Duck in red (dw!)
Saturday, February 6th, 2010 03:52 pm
Since I just made a post and belatedly locked it, leading to at one person going "I clicked 'Read More' and it won't let me! :(": anyone want on the locked post filter who isn't? All it'll require is your immortal soul agreeing to my very reasonable policies.

If you don't want on the filter but are sad about the post: sorry! It wasn't that good anyway.

Because people are lazy:
Poll #2230 Do you agree to my commenting policy and want to be on the filter?
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 17


Do you agree to my commenting policy and want to be on the filter?

View Answers

Yes!
14 (87.5%)

No
0 (0.0%)

Meh
0 (0.0%)

Other
2 (12.5%)

Ticky!

View Answers

Oh thank god, that last question was torture
6 (40.0%)

yay ticky!
10 (66.7%)

I refuse to engage in this pointless ticking
8 (53.3%)

other
3 (20.0%)



(nb: if it's more than a few days or so after I posted this, I probably won't notice that you added yourself, so leave a comment)