One of the bigger stumbling blocks, it seems, when combatting sexism, is the backlash from people who don't see the big picture. It doesn't apply to them, so it's not 'their' issue. But they're allies, so any discussions around privilege get taken personally, and the whole thing can spiral out of control. Since it has always been the expectation that it's women's "job" to soothe hurt feelings and be 'nice' and ignore slights so that things run 'smoothly', not many want to rock the boat further (understandably!), and nothing changes.
The burden is on men as well as women to break down and discard institutionalised sexism, _even if it isn't directly their fault at the time_. This is waaaay harder than it sounds.
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One of the bigger stumbling blocks, it seems, when combatting sexism, is the backlash from people who don't see the big picture. It doesn't apply to them, so it's not 'their' issue. But they're allies, so any discussions around privilege get taken personally, and the whole thing can spiral out of control. Since it has always been the expectation that it's women's "job" to soothe hurt feelings and be 'nice' and ignore slights so that things run 'smoothly', not many want to rock the boat further (understandably!), and nothing changes.
The burden is on men as well as women to break down and discard institutionalised sexism, _even if it isn't directly their fault at the time_. This is waaaay harder than it sounds.