I do get to decide whether an apology is adequate for *my* offense
Agreed, assuming you wouldn't see your offense as the most important thing :) The sort of situation I'm talking about is:
White Person 1: *racist thing* POC: That's racist! WP2: Seconded. WP1: *apology, kind of* WP2: Oh wow let's all celebrate how awesome WP1 is for apologising! POC: That apology wasn't good enough. WP1: Yes it was! Gee, what do you want, blood?
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Agreed, assuming you wouldn't see your offense as the most important thing :) The sort of situation I'm talking about is:
White Person 1: *racist thing*
POC: That's racist!
WP2: Seconded.
WP1: *apology, kind of*
WP2: Oh wow let's all celebrate how awesome WP1 is for apologising!
POC: That apology wasn't good enough.
WP1: Yes it was! Gee, what do you want, blood?