aquaeri: My nose is being washed by my cat (Default)
Aqua, of the Questioners ([personal profile] aquaeri) wrote in [personal profile] sqbr 2009-05-06 03:12 am (UTC)

Re: Joint reply to make the conversation easier to keep track of

Firstly, as you mention, you don't actually know what the intellectually or cognitively challenged think of "stupid". I don't either.

Secondly, I'm not arguing that this is parallel to "crazy", I'm just arguing that it might be parallel to crazy, or at least give you an idea why I'm still on the fence. Let's say I identify with "bitch" at least here as aquaeri: unashamedly opinionated woman who does sometimes hurt other people's feelings with her opinions. I think the number of times I see "bitch" used to mean something that looks awfully like that to me, entirely justifies that idea. But I don't think asking other people not to use the word "bitch" is remotely useful. Not in isolation. It has to be in the context of an awareness of social expectations about women as nurturing, supportive, and not so much not entitled to have strong opinions, as not needing to have strong opinions because surely a man can take care of that for her? And if a man isn't expressing those strong opinions, they're probably not important?

I think I either have to accept the way "bitch" is used by our culture, with an awareness that every time I am opinionated and female, there will necessarily be a lot of negative reactions, because of the way things are. It's not the way things have to be, but I can't see that I have any chance of contributing to changing that, without a very clear awareness of exactly how things are right now. Otherwise we get PrivilegeFails like 'colourblindness'.

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