I'm a Kinsey 3. Gender isn't even on my checklist when I think of what's sexy and what's not. I (obviously) can't speak for all bisexuals, but here's my thoughts on yaoi my experiences.
1)If I am not dating anyone at all, I will be presumed heterosexual. 1a) If I correct this, I will be told I'm confused/experimenting. 2)If I am dating a man, I will be presumed heterosexual. 2a) If I correct this, I will be told I'm confused/experimenting. 3) If I am dating a woman, I will be presumed lesbian. 3a) If I correct this, I will be told that I'm closeted and attempting to retain straight privilege. 4) Do Not Get Me Started on "bisexuals are all sluts" and "proving" I'm not straight/not a lesbian.
In short, I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't. Unless I want to "pass" as straight or lesbian, and deal with the guilt of what amounts to lying about myself, I Am Wrong. I'm not allowed to define my own sexuality, because no matter what I do, I'll be perceived as one box or the other, and even tattooing "BISEXUAL" on my forehead won't help. If I make a point of being vocally bi, I'm a "straight girl trying too hard for the street cred", an argument I'll buy when there's actually cred attached. And yeah, I feel horrible about that, because I'm letting down LGBT causes when I pass as straight—even though I've no choice but to pass. And when I don't pass, I'm still not being honest.
I'm not in the closet as bisexual because I choose to be. I'm in the closet because people keep shoving me into it.
no subject
my thoughts on yaoimy experiences.1)If I am not dating anyone at all, I will be presumed heterosexual.
1a) If I correct this, I will be told I'm confused/experimenting.
2)If I am dating a man, I will be presumed heterosexual.
2a) If I correct this, I will be told I'm confused/experimenting.
3) If I am dating a woman, I will be presumed lesbian.
3a) If I correct this, I will be told that I'm closeted and attempting to retain straight privilege.
4) Do Not Get Me Started on "bisexuals are all sluts" and "proving" I'm not straight/not a lesbian.
In short, I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't. Unless I want to "pass" as straight or lesbian, and deal with the guilt of what amounts to lying about myself, I Am Wrong. I'm not allowed to define my own sexuality, because no matter what I do, I'll be perceived as one box or the other, and even tattooing "BISEXUAL" on my forehead won't help. If I make a point of being vocally bi, I'm a "straight girl trying too hard for the street cred", an argument I'll buy when there's actually cred attached. And yeah, I feel horrible about that, because I'm letting down LGBT causes when I pass as straight—even though I've no choice but to pass. And when I don't pass, I'm still not being honest.
I'm not in the closet as bisexual because I choose to be. I'm in the closet because people keep shoving me into it.
Sorry for ranting at you. :(
Deleted & reposted for HTML fail. (facepalm)