Yes, it does depend how you define love. But whenever I hit a semantic argument my response is usually "It doesn't matter how we define it, what matters is what we think about the underlying concepts."

On further thought, I think a big issue is that certainly with my ex and the abusive partner in that link they have you thinking "Yes, it makes me miserable but they can't help it". And in those cases they can actually help it, but even if you do have a partner who makes you miserable without meaning to (if they just have an incompatible personality, say) that doesn't change the fact that you're miserable. And that's not acceptable, regardless of the other person's intentions.