I remember some ten years ago having this argument with someone (Kanna Ophelia, maybe?) about terminology, and she was arguing that calling f/f slash was like saying "mankind means women too," whereas I was arguing that needing a special term for slash with women was like using 'pilotess' instead of 'pilot' when 'pilot' was gender neutral to begin with - making women into the distaff gender. We never found common ground.

I've had that same debate! To be fair, I'm not sure there is a resolution to it, since both sides in the debate have valid points. It's so frustrating. Why can't we have one right answer that will resolve everyone's problems? ;)