I read the Left Hand of Darkness many years ago, back when I still saw myself as cis. I remember liking it but feeling a bit uncomfortable with the way that everyone's sexuality and gender within the society matched that society's expectations. Le Guin herself later recognised this as a flaw and explored...I forget now but maybe a lesbian or asexual character in a later short story. Also I don't remember feeling much sense of recognition, I think because (at least as I remember it) noone got to really choose or control their gender. In effect, everyone was cisgendered, it was just that their assigned gender changed over time for biological reasons.

Your described character sounds like they'd read as entirely non-binary to me, and after thinking about it some more I rewrote the paragraph about what alienates me. On further thought, the she/her pronouns thing is correlation not causation, and the real issue is works which feel like they're making a big deal about having Diverse Genders while not actually being very varied. Non-binary characters written as characters, rather than symbols, tend to be fine regardless of their specific gender.

Also, the two she/her characters who pinged me as women were in m/nb romance novels using a lot of m/f romance tropes. I think it's the narrative around the characters rather than the characters themselves which is the issue.